Who have I made responsible for my emotions?
A deep and continuous sense of serenity is precious to everyone, especially when moving through one of those chaotic or over-challenging days. But most people have not yet realized that they are single-handedly destroying their own inner peace without even knowing it. It’s easy to do; just make something or someone else responsible for the quality of your emotional state. How often do you blame a colleague at work or a volatile traffic incident for making you feel angry, frustrated or even victimized? Remedy this one bad habit, and you may have taken one big step toward enlightenment.
As I go through a normal day, I realize that I can conjure up a multitude of possible reasons to feel justified in harboring negative emotions. Perhaps I’ll hear myself think, “Who does this jerk think he is; stealing my place in line like that?”, or “How dare this idiot make me look like a fool in front of everyone at the table?”. Then my ego, perhaps something like your ego, justifies manufacturing even the most negative emotions in an attempt to make a dramatically potent enough proclamation in its own defense.
But no matter how justified my ego feels, science now tells me quite adamantly that the impact of the emotions caused by those thoughts upon my brain activity and blood chemistry is seriously destructive; particularly to myself and my body. And, as you might have also experienced, there are unfavorable repercussions to all other relationships because of the resulting attitudes, behaviors and energy.
So, in an effort to stop pretending that I’m completely deaf, dumb and blind to the latest research findings in the neurosciences*, I observe myself more and more to catch the moments when I begin to overreact emotionally. If I sense that I am nervous, defensive or becoming frightened, angry or aggressive, I quickly intervene with a tried and true solution. I go straight to my Safe Haven.
In my daily meditation, I practice developing this Safe Haven by imagining that I am unconditionally loved, guided, cared for and protected by Universal Love. As I align with this most benevolent Power, I feel completely safe. This feeling is with me throughout most of every day. If there is a moment in my day when I begin to feel unsafe, then I purposefully think thoughts that directly reconnect and realign me with that Sacred Source. For, I believe that there is nothing and no one who could ever be more wisely responsible for the quality of my emotional state, than Love Itself. And therein lies my inner peace.